2. I love art
3. I live with one parent
whats probably cuter/funnier is one month-ish later we said 'i love you' for the first time whilst on hockey tour with our team and had been arguing, she was crying and we sat in the mud outside our tent and i told her i loved her...she went all quite bless, and said it in return...whilst kissing n cuddling after some bright spark who we call our friend poured water over us... =P
okay so first thing i just wanna shout bout right now is my most amazing girlfriend...makes me so happy each and everyday and just, wow, amazes me, my life would not be compelte with out her.
she beautifullll!!
secondly, i can finally afford my tattoo, next week...after student loan comes through :D
gonna be something like this, scuse the unnattractive back but thats wehre im gonna get it done...
so, its an owl, i with a C and a J incorporated into it, in memory of my mum. their her initials and her favourite animal was an owl :)
not, as ive been asked a few time, in memory of hedwig.... hehehe
its nearly the end of my first year of university now, really exciting!! got an essay to do and my final pieces to make over the next couple of weeks....can't wait for it to be over and for summer to begin!! yaaay!! =D
unless of course i know i hav pissed them off, of they have pissed me off. then ill just be like 'yeh okay' either in a slightly scared voice or a pissed off one... lol
dont try and get with your friends ex. ever. especially if they end up getting back together, and actually, are rather cute for each other.
so yes, andrea and emma are back together, have bin for like, a month n a bit. i was led on, it seems, by andrea who DIDNT fancy me back and is like that with everyone *shrugs* im pretty much over being treated like that, but i dont think i can have the friendship with either them we could have or i would like to, which im quite sad about really. still, its nice to see them both happy.
now im in another bit of a muddle, hahaha so i think i fancy this girl laura, but its entering my mind thats more to do with how heartbroken she is atm and i just want to protect her and make her feel better. she is also really quite cute.
but then there is hannah, a previously 'straight' girl who i pulled a ouple of months ago, whilst very very very drunk and didnt think anything of it, i dont think neither of us did, i seem so, rude beign like that, loking back and i dont like it one bit. then more recently we got into relaly heavy pulling...i ended up with huge hickey's on my neck which didnt go for quite a while. i found out the following day that she fancies me!! she said to out mutual friend that there is 'just something about her' and on that night we pulled said i was hot. i am beyond flattered at that, and for ages have really not fancied her, but its always in my mind wondering what it would be like.
i admit she has got THE most amazing body, and now i have gotten to know her better, been chatting and flirting a bit for a month shes funny, quirky but also can be fairly serious. im just hesitant to start anything at the risk of nto following through and ending u hurting her.
i also find it ironic this is an almost reverse situation to what i was in with andrea... tho im not sort-of-taken and me and hannah pulled, not just had a nice cuddle on a friends floor.
im so stuck on what to do!!! any advice would be lovely. i think i probably deserve soem criticism too tbh, i feel ive acted a right twat!!
cheers :)
what fucking bullshit. saw that on the news just now and it made me so outraged!!! didnt help that my dad proceeded to tell me 'well, that's has to be one of the first times i've agreed with the pope' arghhh, makes me to angry how homophobic he is!! both of them!
sure your entitled to your own opinion, particularly something as big a deal as 'homosexuality' but to compare it to a situation that could potentially destroy earth-cliate change?? outrageous. grrr...
its disgusting, the homophobic attitudes of some people.
anyone agree, disagree? i feel like a discussion/debate/something.
a rich-ish one, so there are PLENTY of posh, stuck up customers.
one lady, who always complains about something at least once a day, came up to the bar one day and aksed for a broom. i was a little confused, offered my services to clean up whatever it was, so i went out there after i had served the few customers at the bar, with the broom and what did i find, the door mat sticking out of the bin!! cheeky woman, just because 'it was looking worn and dirty, i just HAD to throw it away...' not excactly her place to...
and all she wanted me to sweep up was the leaves under her table because they looked 'messy' gar, im not lookin forward to xmas when i get to go back and serve her.... :(
sooo, im guessing you guys read my last post about accidently getting involved with Andrea and Emma..... stepped out for a bit, or at least tried....it's really hard when you end up FALLING for one of the girls, namely Andrea... :(
can't remember if i said in my last post about me and andre sharing a floor, after flirting like crazeeee all night, in a mate room. she had been sick a lot so i was looking after her, sat behind her on the bed before hand rubbingher back and stuff, then, on the floor, we ended up falling asleep whilst holding hands and cuddling.... i think perhaps that's when i really started fancying her.
the following morning (about 6.30, after only 2 horus sleep) emma was calling andrea constantly trying to find out where she was, and we both knew that she would flip out if she knew me and andrea were sleeping on the same floor, so i went back to mine almost straight away...after throwing up in the bathroom :(
and after that me and andrea just continued to flirt heavily whenever emma wasn't there....looking back now, it seemed so, i dunno, immature to be waiting for emma to go so we could just flirt, but i think we just didnt want ema harrassing us abotu that, *shrugs*
there was a lot of hands down the back of trousers and stuff like that...
emma, realllywants andrea back and has lost it a little it trying to do that so a week and a bit ago, after andrea and a few others were at mine watchign the l word, emma came over and tryed to talk to andrea, i didnt want her to come up because i was pssed at her, so me and andrea went outside and emma then followed andrea home in her car and waited outside her hosue for about an hour and a half. most of that time i was on the phone to andrea, and after that. we spent 2 1/2 hours on the phone to each other, i really wanted her to cheer up a bit so that was my mission. :)
then there was this one time at the club, our local gay club, that i had thought emma had gone so, drunk as i was, really started hitting on andrea, which apparently had ben obvious the whole night anyway and was upsetting emma. so, i thought emma had gone and, i dont remember this but, i had my hand down the back of her trousers wen apparently i saw emma comign back and whippe dit ou but she had seen.
i spoke to emma on friday and talked to her about it, i wanted to tell her it felt like he was hceking up on me the whole time and that me and andrea couldn't be friends without her there. she turned it round on me saying she was hurt by our lying.....for which i only did as i was scared of the reaction. i had hurt emma and tha twas something i never set out to do, and left me feeling like a right shit all night.
soo after that conversation, i spoke to andrea, and i was a little tipsy by this point, getting ready to go out to a halloween party, and told her i needed to stop seeing her so much on her own because of the way i felt about her and i reallly didnt want to hurt emma's feelings, which i already had.
she then said that she liked me too, but agreed with me that our 'feelings' were something that had to be nipped in the bud.
i would love to be with andrea so bad right now, i just soooo dont want to hrt emma anymore. pls if e start anything now anyway, it will look like we have ben lying before saying there was nothing going on.
*sigh* i cant handle being around andrea so much.....last time i was thinking about someone this much, i was thinking about ellie....and we all knwo how shitty *that* ended up!!!!
but, i have some nice pics of me on halloween...... i think my face paint was quite appropriate...lol
an, because i ca't resist, here is andrea..... :)
well, me and andrea.lets set the story, for two years, Emma and Andrea were in love and going out, they were also previously friends. then about 3 weeks ago Andrea found out that Emma had been asking another girl for sex, by reading her kin of onvious texts!
So, on the wed just gona we all got verrry drunk (were all on the hockey club and it was club social) and at the end of the night Andrea didnt have anywhere to stay because the couple she was gonna stay with had had a HUGE arguement. so i offered up my bed, and i would be sleeping on the floor. so we headed back to mine, and allt he time andrea had been rejecting emma's calls. she was calling becaus emost everyone had told her me and andy were going back together so emma rpesumed we were gonna sleep together. as nice and andy is, that wasnt going to happen.
so, me and andy were chatting, then emma calls me, really rude and angry asking where andrea was etc, so i passed the phone over and went to assure my flat mates i would not be sleeping with the girl in my room :P when i came back andrea was in tears and still argueing with emma. i cant really remember the convo, but andrea was just explaining why she wasnt staying at nat and morley's in the end and emma was blaming her for everything. so i listened to why they had broken up, how much andrea still loves emma, and how she feels, what emma is like etc etc adnrea eventually decided to go back and sleep on the floor of emma's flat mate but when she got there he wouldn't let her in so she kipped on the sofa and went home in the morning
my and andrea seem to have become firm friends now, it nealry broke my heart when se was telling me how emm ahad treated her, and how much she still loved her. she keep sblaming herself bless her.
so, on fri day time, emma had been reading the texts between me and andrea and threw andrea's phone out of the window! on an A road!! its a iTouch as well!
thank fully it was onto a grass verge, but that girls seem sto be a psycho! i feel bad it was my texts that did that. so emma gave andrea the ultimatum of 'stop talking to zoe or you and i cant be friends' wtf?! emma knows i wouldnt sleep with her!! so, yeh, im dreading going back to uni, co sim visiting home atm
euuuuurgh, i want to step out of this, but andrea is a lovely, lovely girl and i dnt like that she's going through this and her other friends also think she shouldn't have been texting me....!??
and then there is Tj, or, Rachael. shes hooot, and funny and just. f.i.t. lol apparently she's playing hard to get.... =/ not sure how to play that one!!! any advice....?
i love autumn, get to wear more comfortable clothes!
wow, what an awesome week i have had!!! being a true fresher and getting pissed every night but one it has been amazing!!
biggest thing i suppose is that i've joined the LGBT society of my Uni and went to a meet and great followed by going to 'The Club', my first gay club woo!! :P was amazing danced with some beautiful girls and chatted up this amazing girl called 'J.D.' who had a mohecan and was just....cooool. the friend i was with some determined to get me pissed because i was a hockey 'fresher' and it worked, i still am a little as i write this! never felt so sick in all my life, so im curled up in bed with my laptop and some music... :)
i came home last nght to my halls at about 3.30 and there was a fire alarm giong off, so my flatmates were all outside to laugh at my drunken stumblings unfortunately... then they were kind enough to put me to bed! im not sure i ever want to get so drunk again, ever!
how was everyone's national talk lieka pirate day yesterday? my and my friend were just pissing ourselves trying a ton of different accent, my sean connery impression being the worst of the bunch!! but i think i managed to convince a couple of people i'm from Dorset which was fun. im so glad with the friends i've made here, they are all amazing girls, im just a little worried about them knowing im Bi, there are one or two that just seem a bit close minded or at least, they will be awkward....we shall have to see i guess!! :P
eurgh, i just wen tot have a banana, and now i fell very, very sick.... :(
the freshers ball was awesome (i was baaad, i told mysefl i wasn't gonna pull on my first night and what do i go and do!!!?? on the dance floor too to cat calls.)
second night, which was back to school, so of coruse i geeked out and wore my gryffindor scarf and a school uniform type thing was beyond brilliant because the EDITORS were dj-ing of course they cleared the dance floor of dancing people with the mashed up indie tunes, but oh wells i still carried on
the guy from saturday nights name is George (and yes he is a red head! :P) and he's hawt but im not fussed if nothing happens really, more up for a good time than anything else! alredys igned up with a group of people to go to a gay club in hanley this weekend, my frist one! woop!! and on the first night i met a girl who had only just come out, i think the both of us very pleased to meet someone else in the same boat! she's cool
my flat mates are excellent, really funny and were already at war with the floor below stealing stools and our hoover they are! were trying to come up with good revenge and mine all seem to be fire hazards unfortunately! (like duck taping their doors shut putting super glue int he key holes etc)
im just so bloody excited to be strting all of this!
my room is great, not too small like i thought it was gonna be, and the bed it suprisingly comfy! got my own pillow though from home. posters and photo's up everywhere!
dressing as someone from 'a clockwork orange' tomoz night which'll be good. was hopping today and say a bowler hat and was like 'MUST HAVE IT!!
andway, ill keep y'all updated with everything!!! tarrah! :)
so, i read this > http://www.mugglenet.com/movies/movie6/e
so, my weekend! i finally got out saturday which was awesome. met up with Dave, had our usual coffe and chat for like, an hour and a half. it was great to catch up, i haven't seen him in months!!! then i bought a couple of CD's-this is wher i go slightly off-track-. Goldfrapp and Get Cape, Wear Cape, Fly. Get Cape is AMAZING. i saw them a couple of years ago supporting The Flaming Lips and their energetic stage presence gripped me so much. Fast and powerful guitar strumming trumpets, drums, a few tracks with piano, and electonika voice backings on a few tracks too really bring the album into a whole new level sofr me. no track is the same and it's not like any 'indie' music i've heard before. catchy beats and melody's have got me singing it. the album's called 'the chronicles of a bohemian teenager' and a few songs that have stuck out (mainly because they were played live when i saw them) are I-Spy, War of the Worlds and Call Me Ishmael. seriously, in vest in this album, its BRILLIANT.
so, back to the weekend. later that night it was Emma's boyfriends suprise bday party at a pub saw Sarah and Suzi and they all gasped at my newly peirced ears haha. Sarah liked her cake which was great, alhtough i ended up not going back to hers after the party as i had planned...there was no room. they did offer to give me a lift home, but left too early for my liking (i was in bed by 11.00!??) met up with Justin too, he's been travelling all year so it was great to see him again. and met cool new people as well! all in all, a great time!
my only regret is that i felt like shit this morning and have been to my sisters for a roast dinner before i go uni. she gave me a whole load of make up she didn't want....expensive stuff!! which was cool, i feel like it's christmas...almost!
working tomorrow unfortunately, but i'll try and get out of working tuesday..i've got to start packing!! aargh! it's coming so soon.
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